Trusting God

Readings for June 23, 2019
Solemnity of the Most Holy Body and Blood of Christ

Genesis 14:18-20
Psalm 110
1 Corinthians 11:23-26
Luke 9:11-17

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At my “blogging office” (our kitchen table), I have a Cross that has the verse from Proverbs 3 to trust the Lord at all times. I also recite the verse as part of my daily prayers. And, I have had instances when I fully placed my trust in God. It was at times when nothing else seemed like it would help. Desperate for something, anything, I surrendered all to Him, and trusted Him to carry me through. And it worked every time I’ve done so.

Still, despite the success I’ve found in trusting God when all other options seem impossible, I struggle with giving up control in my day-to-day life. I can, perhaps, find some solace in that the Apostles suffered from a similar lack of trust. When confronting Jesus about letting the large crowds go home to eat, Jesus tells them to “feed them yourselves.” Their reply is something along the lines of, “How could we possibly do that? We have barely enough fish and bread to feed ourselves and the grocery stores are already closed for the day. Impossible.” This, of course, harkens back to the second line of the Proverbs verse regarding leaning on their own understanding.

Personally, I can easily convince myself that I could “seek His will” and be shown the correct path if Jesus was standing in front of me telling me to “feed them yourself.” But perhaps not. I can believe without a complete and full understanding because faith is, after all, a gift. But trust? That is not something that has come easily to me. Trusting others, even God, is difficult for me–especially because trusting God and accepting His ways as sovereign in my life can only come after I accept my own humanity. It’s difficult for me to let go and let someone else takeover until I can accept my own shortcomings and say, “Yeah, okay, MAYBE Your plan is better than mine, God.”

There is a popular expression that says “God accepts us, warts and all.” Perhaps true, but God wants to make sure I understand that I am the one with warts, and His ways are without blemish. He wants me to say, “God, I’m here with my warts. I can only be wart-free when I trust You. So I’m here praying and knowing you will erase my flaws with Your love when I accept You as God and seek to follow Your ways more than my own.” It would seem that only when I seek His healing, only trusting Him as my divine Compound W, can my warts be wiped away.

Then, and only then, can I look at Jesus and say, “Of course I can feed them myself. Tell me how.”

Trust the Lord with all your heart. Do not lean on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do and He will show you which path to take.
Proverbs 3:5-6